...When All is Said and Dunn

Well it's official. I am officially sick of hearing about Elian Gonzalez. For those of you who do not own a TV set, radio, or read any other paper than this one, 10 year old Elian was found Thanksgiving Day floating in an inner tube off the coast of Florida after attempting to escape from Cuba and enter this country illegally with his mother. His mother unfortunately passed away in the attempt so Little Elian ended up with relatives in Miami.

Since that time there has been a firestorm of controversy, especially in Miami, over whether or not Elian should be returned to his father in Cuba or remain here in the United States with his other relatives. This one little incident has cost the United States hundreds of thousand of dollars so far because the anti-Castro factions in Miami have chosen to use Little Elian as their poster boy of the moment.

Despite the best efforts of the United States government to keep this circus from becoming political, it has become just that. On one side you have cigar chomping, fatigue wearing, cartoon Dictator Fidel Castro and the steadfast, never smiling, she-male, Attorney General Janet Reno on the other. Castro's using the situation as his most recent example of the evils of imperialism and Reno's holding hard and fast to the letter of the law. What is completely bizarre is they both are saying the same thing, Elian needs to go home to his father who is still in Cuba.

But the Cuban community in Miami doesn't see it that way; they think he should be right here in the United States with his great uncle. What in the hell are these people thinking? How would this boy possibly benefit from not being raised by at least one of his parents regardless of what country it is? I know that if I had lost one of my parents as a child I would want to cling to the remaining one. So who do these people think they are to deny him this right, just so they can further their cause no matter how righteous they may think it is?

The U.S. relatives initially said they would not give up Elian until the court's ruling said they had to. When the ruling came down saying that Elian should go home to his father, they said only if his father comes and gets him. Juan Miguel Gonzalez, Elian's father, said he would and as I am writing this has applied for a visa and is waiting to hear if it will be approved. Then the U.S. relatives said he could come but they would not release him until the court appeals had run out.

This little game they are playing is about out of time though because Tom Brokaw just told me that the visa has been approved. What's that Tom? How many visas were approved? 28! My God he's picking up one 10-year-old boy--how could it take 28 people to get him back to Cuba? He made it to the U.S. by himself in an inner tube. What are they going to do? Make a human chain so he can walk back? If you believe all the press on this kid he may not need a human chain to walk back.

Every time I write another paragraph for this twisted tale something else changes, which means that by the time you read this it will have morphed into something else. Oh well, I will try to keep up with it until my deadline arrives, which is rapidly approaching, and I am sure Cheri is wondering why this article is taking me so long to send in. Sorry but this little booger is moving faster than a wild fire during a Santa Ana wind.

Now I am hearing from Peter Jennings. He's telling me that Juan Miguel is having second thoughts about coming because those wacky protesters in Miami are getting out of control again. Threatening to make a human chain around Elian's house to prevent anyone from taking him anywhere. They are also promising “civil disobedience” should anyone attempt to break through their lines. Well, what do you know --they just broke through the police barricades. I guess they meant it. What was that I heard the Governor of Florida saying the other day? It was something like “We will not let this situation get out of hand.”

Well, I've got a news flash for you Gov - it has been out of hand for a couple of months now. Elian's father has already made it clear that he wants his son but he doesn't intend to step into that madhouse to do it and he shouldn't have to. Everyone except the anti-Castro loonies has agreed that the meeting should take place in Washington, D.C. So I have two words for you if you have any hope of getting the golden child to Washington D.C.--National Guard.

These people and their overzealous tactics must have been separated at birth from those equally loopy protesters in Westminster who were protesting the shop merchant who was displaying a flag. Don't these people have jobs? They obviously have far too much time on their hands. I'm sure that the only break in any of this madness came when their welfare checks were delivered.

So despite all of the efforts by the Clinton Administration in trying to stay out of an INS situation, it is time to put an end to this foolishness. Because I have a sneaking suspicion the if the father and his entourage are allowed to enter this country we may end up with 29 people who will want to stay here. That's okay, Juan Miguel, just sit tight and we'll send him to you.

If back in November they had just put this kid on a plane to Havana we would not be where we are now. He needs to go home and with all the money that's been spent so far on this fiasco, I think a one way plane ticket it Cuba would have been much cheaper.