...When All is Said and Dunn

George W. Bush has chosen a running mate. Oh, boy! I’m glad he finally decided, because if I lost one more night of sleep worrying about who it was going to be, I just don’t know what I would have done. I have been on pins and needles for weeks now and I am so relieved that the wait is over.

I guess what I am really trying to say is WHO CARES? Yeah, yeah, I know--Republicans care, but let’s get real here. The second they choose Bush as their candidate, which they will make official next week at the convention, they lost the election. The die-hard party liners won’t admit it until the last vote is counted, but deep in their hearts they know he is going to get trounced. Well, maybe not trounced, but he will lose.

While I am currently registered as a Democrat, I have voted Republican in the past and to be honest, I would vote that way again if I thought there was someone Republican worth voting for. That just hasn’t happened in a while and I haven’t seen anyone on the horizon that I would even consider. In my opinion voting only for Democrats if registered Democrat and Republican just because you’re registered Republican is stupid. You are not doing any favors for the country because you are not voting for the best person for the job, just the party line.

This time around without Ross Perot I might be tempted to vote for Ralph Nader, but I am still pissed off about what he did to the Corvair. My grandparents used to have one of those little babies and I just loved it. So forget Nader.

My idea is, we should have the election right now and get it over with. We all know what the outcome is going to be, Democrats and Republicans alike. We’re just going through the motions. Let’s just take all the money that both parties are about to blow on advertising and spend it on something worthwhile, like investing it in the education of our kids. If we did that, maybe we would have better choices in the future than Bush and Gore.

This election, the biggest decision we each have to make is to decide who is less dopey. We have had eight years to see just how dopey Gore can be and at times, quite frankly, he can be. George W. on the other hand has only made his dopey side visible to the country now for the last couple of years. Being hidden in Texas for all of his political life, we in the rest of the country couldn’t get the full view. While some of us applauded his fast action with the scum on death row, we didn’t get to know him. Now that he has exposed himself to us he, has won “The Dopey Derby” hands down.

Gore may be stiff, well stiff may be going a little easy, how about granite or marble, and he may have come up with some whoppers as far as quotes go, but at least he gives the appearance of being aware of what is going on around him. George W. on the other hand seems to be so easily distracted and oblivious to his surroundings in every interview I’ve seen, I can’t believe that his own party felt he was the best choice. I guess the pickings were kind of slim.

With that said and with George W’s drug history a matter of public record, when choosing Dick Cheney as his Vice Presidential running mate, he had to be stoned. Has he not seen his medical records? The man has had 3, count them 3, heart attacks. This is the man that is supposed to be a heartbeat away from the presidency. He’s closer to being a heartbeat away from the cemetery.

My guess is that he is being used as a temporary fix because nobody else thinks that George W. is going to win and they don’t want to be viewed as a loser in the future. Why hook your wagon to a falling star? This way if Bush wins, Dick probably won’t last the term and they will take their chances on being appointed.

There is also the obvious parody and humor aspects built in to the names involved. Why would Bush’s spin doctors let him pick someone that is going to invite the barrage of jokes that Letterman, O’Brien, Kilborn, and Leno are going to heap on him between now and November? Everyone of the comedy writers on these shows I’m sure looked toward the heavens when the announcement was made and said a silent prayer thanking God. Maybe they just sent George W. a nice gift basket and a card thanking him for making their jobs easier for the next 4 months.

I just think that any candidate named Bush who picks a running mate named Dick is too dopey to be president.

With names like that, who knows what they will try to do to the country