...When All is Said and Dunn

This last Wednesday morning, Secretary of State Colin Powell addressed the United Nations Security Council presenting George “Dubya” Bush’s reasons for wanting to start a war with Iraq. This little exercise, as we all know, was not just for the Council’s benefit it was also designed to persuade the rest of us here in the U.S. Those of us who are sitting on the fence about whether or not this whole war with Iraq thing is a good idea. Killing two birds with one stone as the saying goes.

Powell’s arguments were compelling. He and the President decided long ago that there was going to be a war with Iraq and nothing was going to stop them from fulfilling the President’s destiny. That would be to do what his daddy couldn’t, to turn Saddam Hussein into an oil spot in the desert. It’s only a matter of time before the troops that we have deployed, and that are poised and ready to attack, are given the order to rock the casbah.

Twenty years ago, the type of information Powell was divulging this week would never have seen the public light of day. Classified information like this would have only been discussed in a darkened smoke filled room with guards on the outside. Today, everyone feels that they have the right and need to know, or should I say that most news reporters feel you need to know. Personally there are times that I yearn for the covert days of the Cold War years.

I really don’t need to know ever little bit of information on Saddam Hussein. We all know he’s an unstable sadistic scumbag who should be disposed of as soon as possible. Powell spoke non-stop for an hour and a half without commercial interruption. I guess with support for the war losing steam Washington felt they needed to lay all of their cards on the table and go for broke.

Ever since this little chess game began between Saddam and George W, every time somebody in Washington D.C. or the Pentagon burps we hear about it on CNN. Every trivial bit of information, plan, proposed plan, and bit of speculation is talked about over and over again. The plans and solutions are scrutinized by a never ending parade of “specialists” who lay in wait just under the radar until a situation like this arises. I have often wondered what these people do when there isn’t a war to analyze? Maybe they all get together in the basement of the Pentagon for marathon games of Risk!

The same sort of overkill is being exhibited in the ongoing coverage of the Columbia tragedy. While I, like the rest of America, am extremely saddened by its destruction upon re-entry and my heart goes out to the families of those who were lost, how long do we need to relive it? Do they need to show the film of the Columbia breaking up every five seconds? Is it really necessary to do a full-blown news report on every piece of wreckage that’s discovered? Why can’t we just let NASA do their job and the families given time to grieve in peace?

But back to our impending war in Iraq and our need to announce every element of our strategy. Considering how far reaching the airwaves are nowadays how much of a favor are we doing our military by announcing our intentions every day? Do the guys at the Pentagon really think that Saddam Hussein doesn’t have cable or satellite TV? Come on, my gut feeling is that he watches CNN more that anyone else on the planet. Who needs spies when you have a satellite dish and a bunch of people who love the sound of their own voices?

I sat watching in amazement as some general at the Pentagon, surrounded by maps showing the exact positioning of all of our troops, artillery, and aircraft carriers, was explaining how they would be deployed. I’m sorry, but what are you guys thinking? Oh, I get it, this is some sort of covert reverse psychology, right? Those are just fake troops over there and you’re really going to sneak up from behind and surprise them. Because we wouldn’t be dumb enough to tell them where our troops are really stationed. Thank God they don’t sell binoculars or surveillance equipment in Iraq or they would see through your little ruse immediately.

With a little bit of luck, Saddam was watching American Idol instead of CNN. I hear he’s a big fan of Simon Cowell.

The Shrub Speaks: “Should any Iraqi officer or soldier receive an order from Saddam Hussein, or his sons, or any of the killers who occupy the high levels of their government, my advice is, don’t follow that order. Because if you choose to do so, when Iraq is liberated, you will be treated, tried and persecuted as a war criminal.” St. Louis, Missouri, 1/22/03