CALEEFORNIA

by Bill Dunn


It’s Wednesday morning, October 8, 2003. The day after history was made in our great state of California, or, as our new governor pronounces it, “Caleefornia.” All of the television and radio stations are abuzz with constant chatter from every political talking head they can get their hands on speculating on what Governor Terminator is going to do next.

It’s been an interesting ride over the last few months. Like another California institution, The Grateful Dead, once said “what a long strange trip it’s been.” But hey, we’re Californians damn it, we’re trend setters, individuals one and all, who like to march to their own drums. That’s why, along with the political, social, and economic changes, the entire world was watching this recall and election to see who was going to be in charge. We were mad as hell and we weren’t going to take it anymore. We took that battle cry and made it a reality.

Being that our state is the fifth largest economy in the world means that every time there is a hiccup in Sacramento it doesn’t just impact us. Our business tentacles run long and deep across the Pacific and around the world. For example, outside of the country of Korea, California has the highest concentration of Koreans. So when something changes in our business climate it is watched closely far beyond our borders.

That would be happening no matter who was running. Factor in the celebrity angle and you have the makings of a race that has international appeal by people who don’t care about politics one iota. While Arnie won’t be California’s first actor/Governor, having had Ronald Reagan before him, the actor factor was just too big a card not to play. It was a huge draw to his being elected. And Arnie will have to stand in Reagan’s shadow, having been one of the best governors we ever had. Ronnie appeared to be a bit savvier than Arnie appears to be, but I’m hopeful Arnie is a quick study or at least has a good group of advisers in the wings.

Comparing the two based on their filmographies would be a bit tough based on the generations they represent. But at this current time of financial crisis I would say that we need a machine gun toting sword-wielding Arnold more than we need a chimpanzee carrying football-throwing Ronnie. Just like the movies, California needed a different actor for a different role and Arnie seems to have passed the audition.

The actor aspect is where some people couldn’t see past the screen to the man behind it, but I believe the man will come to the surface once he gets his team in place and takes office. Hopefully those vindictive gadflies that always seem to surface towards the end of a campaign will at least let him have a chance. Already, Jesse Jackson is talking about contesting the election based on the ballots. I’m sorry, but why does he have any thing to say about our election?

I used to respect Jesse. As the years have progressed, and I watched him poke his nose into so many places it didn’t belong, my respect has turned to annoyance. Where he once inspired me with his speeches and eloquent delivery, when I now hear him speak it is like I’m hearing a parody of him on Saturday Night Live. Just to be clear, my feelings have nothing to do with the revelations pertaining to his personal life a few years back.

And while we are on that topic, how many of you are absolutely sickened by the mudslinging and character assassination that always seems to take place at the end of a campaign, and by the candidate who is behind? You can try calling it politics as usual but it’s not. 99.9 percent of the time it has nothing to do with the issues and everything to do with the negative feeding of false information to the masses. This was never more on display than during the final days of this campaign.

Sometimes when the aspersions are cast at an individual it is done in such a way that is plausible. In a way that it could have us believe that it actually happened. But when you have 16 women making claims, in the last five days of the campaign, that Arnold groped them, I view it as nothing short of bull. Especially when you take into consideration that most of their allegations allegedly happened a long time ago and that at no time within the statute of limitations were ANY charges filed or even reported. Personally I think they all watched Conan The Barbarian one too many times and have a hard time separating fantasy from reality. 

These types of tactics have been used so many times by Gray Davis that it has become his modus operandi. I, for one, am glad that he is gone and I hope he stays gone. I hope he finds a job in the private sector that is more suited to his talents, whatever those are. Maybe pool maintenance or gardening might work. I would keep him out of any type of office though. Who knows what rumors he might start while hanging out at the water cooler. Old habits die hard.

I think that we are all fed up with politicians and I think that is one of the reasons Arnold was successful in his bid for governor. He is more a leader than a politico. Considering how well our recall went every elected official in the United States better stay on their toes and do what they were elected to do. As far as I know there are actors in every state.

Too bad we couldn’t have gotten rid of Cruz Bustamante at the same time. I wonder who was doing his job for the last two months while he was out campaigning? I bet Gray has got some serious dirt on him as well. Maybe he can hook us up with a picture of Cruz groping Mark Macarro of the Pechanga Indians while visiting their casino.

Now there’s a rumor worth starting.

The Shrub Speaks: As members of the press corps here know, I have, at times, complained about leaks of security information, whether the leaks be in the legislative branch or in the executive branch. And I take those leaks very seriously. ...I'd like to know who leaked, and if anybody has got any information inside our government or outside our government who leaked, you ought to take it to the Justice Department so we can find out the leaker. ... And, you know, there's a lot of leaking in Washington, D.C. It's a town famous for it. And if this helps stop leaks of -- this investigation in finding the truth, it will not only hold someone to account who should not have leaked -- and this is a serious charge, by the way. Washington, D.C., Oct. 6, 2003
B.D.’s response: Gee Dubya sounds like you’ve found the makings of a great new board game “Find the Leaker.”


Bill Dunn can be contacted at info@sgvweekly
Some of his previous articles can be found here.