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You know that something wacky is going on when the temperature in Alaska is warmer than the temperature in Southern California. This is what was being reported on the news on Tuesday, so you can take that for what it’s worth. But if there is one thing that our local weather people excel at it is hindsight. So if the weather has already passed you can pretty much take it as gospel that it is a fact, well sort of.
I don’t know if there is some scientific reason to blame for the problem of our recent bizarre weather, like global warming or the earth spinning off its axis, but something is up. All I know is that over the last few years our weather, and not just here in California, has been slipping out of character.
Maybe it’s the ancient prophecies of Nostradamas coming to fruition or maybe some Iraqi monk casting a black magic spell over us, who knows. All I know is that it has me thinking. Me, who wears shorts everyday unless it’s snowing, about making a wardrobe change. Thinking is the key word here because until it does snow in this area I will fight it until, as Popeye sez “I can’ts stands no more.”
Sure, I have gotten the odd look during the last few days when I enter a room full of people who are bundled up like they were at a snow lodge but I really don’t care. If they are comfortable dressed like they are about to hit the slopes and I’m dressed like I’m going to the beach who’s to say who’s right? I am eternally warm so when the air is cold and I don’t have to turn on the air conditioning, I embrace it.
Personally, I don’t think they are all as cold as they want me to think they are. I think a lot of people want to parade out their winter finery the second the thermometer dips below 75 degrees. Usually their winter clothes are sitting in mothballs waiting for that September calendar page to be torn off exposing the yellow and orange colors of October. At that point all bets are off regardless of what the temperature reading is. It is officially time to start layering on clothes.
At this point in my life I could give a damn about what people think and I am not going to be dressing to impress, nowadays it is all about the comfort. Unless I am doing something business related I will be wearing as few clothes as possible and the most comfortable ones I can get away with without looking like a low end Kmart shopper.
I have to admit this is quite a change from my single days when I was on the hunt for a mate or a date and fashion played a high priority in the game. Nowadays there are far to many other things that I need to worry about other than if I can wear white after Labor Day.
I find this especially true when as of late my mom has been pulling out a slew of photos from my youth. My kids have been in hysterics over some of my past fashion choices. In one picture from the 70’s they both agree that I am a dead ringer, fashion wise, for the character of Fez on “That 70’s Show.” For those of you who are not fans of the show and are unfamiliar with the character, this is not a compliment.
But back to our current weather front, or in the vernacular of our television weather heads, “Cold Front 2004,” or whatever scary moniker they want to give it this week to make it sound more traumatic than it is. While we have been experiencing colder temperatures than usual compared to other parts of the country, c’mon, we all know that we’re baking here. Try telling somebody in Minnesota that you’re talking to on the phone that you’re shivering and that you’re wearing two jackets because our daytime high has dipped down to a bone chilling 62 degrees. Trust me when I tell you that they will literally laugh your ass off the line.
How could you blame them considering their daytime high tops out at 13 degrees? If these people happen to get a feed from one of our local morning TV shows, like what we get from WGN in Chicago, is it any wonder that the people in the Northeast think Californians are a bunch of wimps? As I watched the news this morning I saw person after person being interviewed about the weather. Of course it was the lead story on the local news, never mind that we are engaged in a war, it was more important to report on all the locals whining about how cold it is. Good lord people, butch up and shut up!
The only thing that I have seen as a positive outcome over all of this local over hype over a few degrees was the exposed deception on the part of a popular game show. Apparently the folks on Jeopardy did a little tampering with the timetable on the exiting of Ken Jennings, their mega winner. What came to light on Wednesday was that Ken didn’t lose this week on Tuesday as they made us think. He actually lost on September 16th, but decided not to air it until now, funny enough during the peak of November sweeps.
It turns out that the smoking gun was the fact that when they showed the audience displaying their adulation for the contestant, who was on his 75th appearance and had won over two and a half million dollars, they were all wearing short sleeved shirts and shorts. This little fact was enough to get the shows’ producers to cop to their subterfuge.
Now if I had been in the audience…….
The Shrub Speaks: I'm the kind of fellow who does what I think is right, and will continue to do what I think is right. Ottawa, Canada, Nov. 30, 2004
B.D.’s Response: Unfortunately, what you think is right is putting us billions of dollars in debt and letting thousands of our children go to war.
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