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You can definitely tell that summer is here. Sweltering heat followed by skyrocketing electric bills and thanks to the recent price hike by the Evil Empire, I mean the Edison Company, this year it’s 30% higher. You can either sweat and listen to your family complain about the heat or pay the Edison piper. Unfortunately we have to go with the latter.
While the rising heat is the first telltale sign that summer is here, it truly doesn’t become official until we get to the Fourth of July. I should really say, for those of us who live in communities where fireworks are sold, survive the Fourth of July.
Don’t get me wrong, I love fireworks. I mean LOVE them. I could literally watch them for hours. I also like the fact that our youth groups can sell the safe and sane variety and make much needed funds for their organizations. I even did my shift at the TCHS Baseball fireworks stand with my wife Stacey and our friends Ralph and Kathy Montenegro.
Just on a side note to that last line, a year ago after I completed what I thought was going to be my last shift at a fireworks stand I made the mistake of writing about it. Less than 24 hours after that article came out I got a phone call from Kristen Dearth, former president of TC National Little League and current Queen Bee of TCHS Baseball, to correct me that it had not been my last dance at the fireworks stand. In fact, I would have four more years of high school baseball fireworks stand shifts to look forward to. A fact that she re-emphasized from the dais at the SRO end of the baseball banquet. I learned my lesson, never say never.
But back to what I was initially talking about, surviving the Fourth of July and the arrival of summer. The problem is not with people who use the safe and sane variety of fireworks. It is with those twisted individuals who are not satisfied with those. They smuggle into the areas that sell legal brands the type of fireworks that should only be handled by professionals. They are definitely more prevalent in areas that allow fireworks because they are easier to fire off undetected, lost in the mix if you will.
Every year the police and fire departments threaten tougher enforcement of the laws pertaining to these little weasels that endanger life and property. They put on dramatic presentations, blowing up watermelons and hands of disembodied mannequins in an attempt to frighten potential amateur pyrotechnic terrorists. This year, as it seems like it does every year, the fines are increased.
Unfortunately, despite the threats of increased financial penalties and pictures of produce and body parts exploding, each year it gets worse. Every year my family and I go up on our roof to get optimum visibility of the nearest fireworks show that is put on by professionals a few blocks away. In addition to that display we can also see displays that are going on three cities away. What we also see is all of the illegal fireworks that are being shot off in between. I am not exaggerating when I say that this year was the worse so far.
For an hour before and three hours after the professional displays, it looked and sounded like a war zone. It was the scene out of “Apocalypse Now” when the main characters were crossing the Do Lung Bridge into Cambodia, that or the fall of Saigon. From our perch we could tell exactly where the repeat offenders were but they continued their assault unfettered by law enforcement.
In years past, when the rockets red glare were getting a little too close for comfort, I tried to stop the little punks by calling the local law enforcement. I gave them the quadrants and position of the attack only to be told that they already had someone patrolling the area. If they did, it didn’t seem to help because the attack continued until they ran out of ammo. Since then I don’t bother reconnaissance, I just keep a hose at the ready.
If you think that my paranoia is misplaced consider this. By the time the eleven o’clock news rolled around there were already three reports of casualties of this yearly one-day war.
In Simi Valley, an 80-year-old man, after visiting his wife’s grave, came home to find his house destroyed due to illegal fireworks being shot off near his home. A brush fire near Hesperia erupted due to the callous disregard of pyro soldiers there. And an elderly woman died when her Silver Lake home caught fire because of illegal fireworks.
These were only three incidents that happened to make the news. I’m sure there were many more, but once the explosive holiday was in the books, the newsworthiness dwindled. I guess they will save the rest until next year when more scare tactics are needed.
If they really want to stop these guys they need to do it from a high vantage point or from the air. Obviously, doing it from the ground in a patrol car is not cutting it. Now that I think about it, I never see that search helicopter in the air on the Fourth of July. You know the one they dispatch at a moment’s notice every time they are looking for some little creep who just robbed a 7-11 and circle a given area for hours at a time.
Maybe they are as afraid of getting shot out of the air as we are of watching our houses catch on fire. Fair enough, I suppose. But considering the magnitude of the problem they may want to put the fear of god into those savages next year by shining that mega watt spotlight on them.
If not that, how about erecting some temporary metal towers in strategically placed locations and manning them with SWAT team members with night vision goggles. They could do one of two things while up there: 1) Pin point the positions on the launch pad and let the ground forces take over or 2) If they have a clean shot, fire back at them with rubber bullets. You nail a couple of them with those bad boys and they will think twice before shooting off more illegal fireworks.
OK, enough about the fireworks portion of the dawning of summer. How about a problem that I have ranted about in the past that sticks with us during the entire summer and sometimes beyond. The Invasion of the Visor Army. I can’t speak for other parts of the country, but anyone who lives in the San Gabriel Valley knows what I am talking about.
As soon as the sun’s rays break through the clouds, out come the visors. Not the type of visor that you wear while playing golf or tennis, the ones that look like a blacked out version of a welder’s mask. As soon as I see one of them I start laughing immediately.
I have given them many monikers, but perhaps one of the best one came from a reader’s young son. Last summer, when the numbers of these annoying devices began increasing, the reader’s son said that the wearers all looked like The Power Rangers, which they do. Through a child’s eyes they just look kind of goofy or cartoonish, which is true regardless of what age you are. To anyone who is attempting to share the road in an automobile they are at the very least frustrating, if not downright dangerous.
Eye contact and the ability to see where the other driver is looking are important. This is especially true nowadays when what seems like half of the driving public is incapable or unwilling to use their turn indicators. Combine the two and you have a recipe for disaster.
It is as though they think that their visors render them invisible and they can drive like a monkey and nobody will see them. Give them a cell phone and you can change that description to a drunken monkey.
Many even wear them when they are indoors and maintain their invisibility illusion. They think that if you can’t see their faces that they can cut in line in front of you at a store and you won’t notice them. I don’t know what kind of fantasyland these people are from, but their facemasks make them more noticeable not less.
I have said it in the past and I still believe it to be true, that as more people wear them, that sooner or later the criminal element will make it their mask of choice when committing armed robberies. It will also be a way for criminals and illegal aliens to disguise themselves while out in public. They should be banned not only for the present danger they pose to drivers, but also for their potential danger in the future.
Considering this facemask problem is just in the infancy stages and the illegal fireworks problem keeps escalating and is only thought about or seriously addressed once a year, neither looks like it will be resolved anytime soon unless more drastic steps are taken.
Well maybe next summer...
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