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“Always see it on TV, Or read it in the magazines, Celebrities who want sympathy. All they do is piss and moan, Inside the Rolling Stone, Talkin about how hard life can be.”- “Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous” by Good Charlotte
While those lyrics were very prophetic when the song came out in 2002, and still are, I can’t help wondering if their position has changed since joining the club. The boys in Good Charlotte are definitely part of the rich and famous, dating actresses and being regulars in the tabloid press.
For those who court the celebrity beast and want to ride that dragon, the loss of one’s privacy is part of the price you pay. To hear somebody who lives in a mansion, vacations in St. Barts, while making 20 million dollars for six weeks work, complain about anything is beyond annoying. It also gets no sympathy from most of the people who live in the real world.
Why should it? They are the ones whose insatiable appetites for anything celebrity keeps the wheels of interest in the rich and famous lifestyles going. The celebrities who want to continue being celebrities ought to stop complaining about their loss of privacy, because as soon as the interest in their lives goes away, well, so do they.
Sure the paparazzi are a bunch of bottom dwelling scum whose tactics border on a military style assault. They have become far too aggressive for what their job entails, but their tactics are the spawn of the little game that the celebrities created, so who is to blame?
Not all celebrities feel victimized by the paparazzi, some take it in stride and go with the flow. They understand the nature of the business and its pitfalls. These are the ones who seem to be the more talented of the bunch and definitely smarter. When they go out they know that every camera lens in the area will be trained on them regardless of where they go and they go about their business without doing anything stupid.
On the flip side, you have the Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan’s of the entertainment world. They are the poster children of what not to do when in public. It seems like every time they step into public they are dead set on making a fool of themselves. I suppose you could chalk it up to youth, but I have seen 10 year olds who have more sense that these two idiots.
I mean how much logic and forethought does it require to know that if you are on your way out to a high profile party, where numerous celebrities will be in attendance, that the paparazzi will be there. With that in mind and also knowing that you will be getting in and out of an SUV in a mini skirt, what demon would possess you not to put on a pair of panties?
Spears, who doesn’t appear to be one of those people who learns from her mistakes, repeated this foolish act two more times. Now anyone who wants to view her private parts can do so, at will, over the Internet. If she was that desperate to display her goods to the world she should have just posed for Playboy.
At least she would have made a few bucks that she could have donated to charity or given to her ex-husband. The pictures would have been a lot more tastefully done as well. Although that option would have taken some fore thought and as we have discussed, that doesn’t appear to be her forte.
Her party buddy Lohan, is nothing more than a train wreck waiting to happen. While she hasn’t exposed her naughty bits yet, she has done everything in her power to sabotage her marginal career so far, not yet twenty one and again constantly in the public eye, she has already been to rehab for alcohol and drug abuse.
That of course hasn’t stopped her from making a spectacle of herself at every opportunity. She hasn’t had the brainpower to figure out that every time she puts a glass to her lips that somebody with a camera is going to be there to document the occasion. If it isn’t the regular paparazzi it will be a paparazzi wannabe with a cell phone camera.
Such was the case when she was at a night cub recently with somebody she didn’t know very well. The hanger on with the cell phone camera was present as Lohan, in a public place, thought it would be a good idea to snort some cocaine. Of course the junior paparazzi, looking to make a couple of bucks, filmed the scene to preserve it for prosperity. What a moron. I am referring to Lohan, not to the fledgling paparazzi. She of course would just be a parasite.
The ones who irritate me the most are the ones with virtually no talent, who seem to garner the most press. The high priestess of this phenomenon is, without dispute, Paris Hilton. She crawled into the public eye by being famous for being famous and it would have been great if it had stayed that way.
This talent less nightmare has used the shotgun effect as far as her so-called career goes. First a reality TV show with the equally clueless Nicole Richie that sucked, then a movie that sucked, followed by an album that really sucked. Somewhere in between these endeavors she found the time to make an amateur porn movie with her boyfriend at the time that really, really…well you know.
In case you missed it, just like Spears’ nudity, it is readily available on the Internet. Unlike Spears though, Paris knows how to make a bit of change the old fashion way, you have to pay to see hers. After all, she is a Hilton.
Despite her attempts to legitimize her fame, her true place in the public eye has become that of professional party girl and guide to bad behavior for the likes of Spears and Lohan. I guess you could say misery loves company, or in their case, press coverage.
So it was no surprise when all of the press that Hilton thrives on came back to bite her in her spoiled little derrière. In case you haven’t been watching the news, Hilton, as if anything Paris Hilton does can be considered such, was driving while her license was suspended and got caught. This was not any great feat of police work they just had to follow the Bentley speeding with its headlights off.
When she went to face the judge for violating her probation, there wasn’t one drop of sympathy in the courtroom. The judge, who was obviously familiar with her press, let her have it and gave her the maximum sentence he could, 45 days in the hoosegow. Too bad it couldn’t have been longer so we wouldn’t have to be hearing about her so much.
Her sentence didn’t sit well with Mama Hilton, who like any mother came rushing to he daughter’s defense, claiming that the punishment was “pathetic and disgusting and a waste of taxpayer money.” She since has had a change of heart and had Barbara Walters read her statement on The View, which I’m sure Barbara would do for any of us if we asked. Mama Hilton now blames herself for her little girl’s obnoxious behavior, which she should have done from the start.
Paris’ defense was that she was didn’t know that she couldn’t drive at all and thought she could drive to work. Considering that it was 11PM when she was pulled over, I guess she keeps different work hours than the rest of us. Maybe she was late for a work party. Personally I would have given her another 45 days just for being so stupid. Unfortunately what that 45 days truly equates to is only 23 days behind bars, too little to make a permanent impact on somebody like Hilton who thinks the world revolves around them.
I hope that these three, Spears, Lohan, and Hilton, will serve as a cautionary tale for any aspiring young people who long for the glare of the spotlight that shines on the rich and famous. If you want the job, be prepared for all of the attention you will be getting. If you make it there, don’t whine about it once you get it.
You also may want to turn on your headlights at night when you’re driving and make sure to put on your underwear before you go out.
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